Holding the Man

Two words: MUST READ

Holding the Man is an incredible autobiographical novel told by Timothy Conigrave. We meet Tim in high school in Melbourne, Australia and follow him throughout his formative years, discovering his sexuality and ultimately meeting the love of his life, John. We follow these two throughout their often strained, but never waivering relationship. Through separation at college, to weeks away on business, extra-relationship affairs, disapproving family and life-threatening illness we see both the flaws and the strengths these two men have.

Tim and John

What I love most about this book is that we see a gay couple who are unabashedly in love with each other, and don't give a toss as to what others think of their relationship. Their love radiates outward and shines on whomever they encounter. They have high and low points, but no matter what they encounter they always remain a couple. I think that is what struck me so much in reading this book. Far too often we see couples who go their separate ways rather than stay and fight for what they have. While disappointing each other several times in their years together, Tim and John always remained in each other's hearts.

I won't give away the ending of the book, but needless to say I was in tears for the last 10 pages. It was difficult to read, and I had become so attached to these people that I felt a loss when I was finished. The friends they made are truly blessed to have known them, and I felt myself wishing I knew them as well.

When I was done reading the book I crawled into bed and held my partner Nick tight, sobbing into a pillow. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him. He kissed me and drifted back to sleep, and at that moment I felt such an intense love for him that I didn't want to let go.

Anyone who is in love, has ever loved or who wants to read an amazing love story of two people who overcome life and death together MUST read this book. It will forever remain close to my heart, and a book I will re-read for many years to come.